The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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