You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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