the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Randomize
