I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
