I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
What drink are we having for lunch?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf