Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
