It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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