If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize