So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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