I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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