So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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