Plan B is the new Plan A
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
