..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
