So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I wish i was in the wii world.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize