bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Randomize
