I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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