My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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