Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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