I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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