Your mouth is God's brothel.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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