Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
