yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
