i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
