omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
i think i just lost a toe
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
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