Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
