take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize