Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
