and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
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Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
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Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
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