just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
