This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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