Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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