I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
A+ Viking dick
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
