me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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