can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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