It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
