You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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