Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
