I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
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You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
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