just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize