yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
