so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Dear god my vagina.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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