I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
