dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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