Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
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