Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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