Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize