Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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