I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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