Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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