Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
