Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
