do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
It's shark week go big or go home
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
